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April 19, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. Judaism’s Conservative movement has lifted a ban in place since the 13th century prohibiting Jews from eating rice during Passover. Said Jews, “Any new developments on bacon?” 2. Sunday night, the...
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May 12, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Tuesday, a professional baseball player in Japan won a year’s worth of beer after launching a homerun that hit a Kirin Beer sign in the stands. With all that free beer, let’s hope he’s not the...
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May 25, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. According to a new study, letting your baby ‘cry it out’ instead of interfering is an effective sleep training method that does not cause stress or lasting emotional problems for the baby. The study...
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June 16, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Wednesday, while speaking on behalf of Hillary Clinton, President Obama said his daughters think it’s weird that America hasn’t had a woman president yet. Although, I’m pretty sure they would...
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October 18, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. Yesterday, Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump pledged that the United States and India would be “best friends” if he is elected. “You can’t have two best friends!” shouted a very upset...
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September 29, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. During a speech in Alabama last week, President Trump said, “I might have made a mistake. I’ll be honest, I might have made a mistake.” Then he brought Eric on stage. 2. During a speech in Alabama...
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October 13, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. The student Academy Awards were held on Thursday in Beverly Hills. They are just like the regular Academy Awards except to get nominated you don’t have to watch Harvey Weinstein masturbate into a...
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December 15, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. According to a recent report, President Trump watches up to eight hours of TV a day. But, in Trump’s defense, sometimes Blue’s clues are tricky and he has to re-watch an entire episode to figure it...
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January 5, 2018 – Monologue Jokes
1. A group of Egyptian soccer players have formed a team for one-legged players. That story again, a group of Egyptians invented foosball: 2. According to a soon-to-be released book, President Trump...
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March 23, 2018 – Monologue Jokes
1. In a recent interview, O.J. Simpson ripped Colin Kaepernick’s “bad choice of attacking the flag.” And by that I assume Simpson means Kaepernick should have attacked the flag and a waiter. 2. Over...
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